The TSA Show

KnifeI recently asked a friend, who travels frequently, about airport check-in security. He laughed and pulled out his Swiss Army knife. Not one of the tiny pin knives, but a knife with a four-inch blade.

“I forgot I had this in my pocket and went right through security.”

Isolated incident? Maybe. But does any reasonable person honestly believe we’re any safer on a plane than we were on September 10th? Do you think a terrorist group couldn’t smuggle a Stinger shoulder-fired missile into this country, park near a major U.S. airport, and knock down a plane? Remember, he’s not trying to get away.

So what’s all the TSA frenzy about. Show. A highly visible charade that accomplishes two things: 1. Persuade the American public their government is doing something to keep them safe. 2. Remind them they must be fearful and trust the government… to keep them safe.

American Airlines: Boarding of the Fittest

Departurelounge

How bad has air travel in the U. S. become? We all know about the delays, canceled flights, germ-laden air, 12-hours-on-the-tarmac and all the rest. But the story my friend George shared this weekend is, I fear, a chilling portent of what’s ahead.

He and a colleague were flying back from a business trip (Baltimore to St. Louis) on American Airlines. Of course the flight was over-booked (by three people) and the gate agent offered vouchers for anyone willing to give up their seat (I think he said it was $200).

A little while later they made the announcement again, including some reference to not being able to depart until the oversold problem (now down to two) was resolved. Still no takers.

A few minutes later the agent came back on the PA and made an announcement that George recalls as:

"Ladies and gentlemen. We are still oversold and we can’t delay departure any longer. Please line up for boarding… the last two people in line will not get on this flight."

George couldn’t believe his ears. Everyone in the departure area looked at each other for a second and then stampeded, pushing and elbowing trying to insure they wouldn’t be at the end of the line.

This might just be the most chicken-shit thing yet from an airline. The gate agent could determine the last two passengers to book the the flight and break the bad news. Instead, they made the other passengers fight and claw like animals to get on the plane.

What about the infirm or women with babies, I asked. "No pre-boarding of any kind."

Yes, maybe this was an isolated incident. One gutless gate agent. But
can you imagine if this is –or becomes– standard procedure?

“Waning Days of the Road Warrior”

I hate air travel. Not “white knuckle” hate, but “hassle hate.” Fortunately I don’t have to do much of it any more. But lots of people in our company do and I feel for them. I also wonder how much of it is really necessary. Usually while playing with iChat and live video streaming.

Latest issue of Business Week has an article titled, The Waning Days of the Road Warrior (Why the current slowdown in business travel may not end when the economy recovers).

“For years, Irv Rothman, CEO of Hewlett-Packard’s Financial Services division, traveled at least once a quarter—top three lieutenants in tow—from his New Jersey base to HP’s Silicon Valley headquarters. After enduring Newark airport hell and six-and-a-half hours of stale, germy air, the team would arrive, strung out, to meet with their boss. For one hour. Then they would turn around and do the whole thing all over again.

The super surge in oil prices and resulting spike in airfares is just one reason companies are ordering their road warriors home. Factor in, too, the misery of modern air travel, which has de-glamorized the business junket. HR types also have a new appreciation for how the frequent-flier lifestyle can wreck executives’ health and family lives. And they have come to realize that jetting off for a one-hour meeting, while instinctual for corporate strivers, is rarely productive.

So, if managers aren’t flying to meetings, what are they doing? Using newfangled technology that is finally delivering the kind of Star Trek-y, space- and time-shifting experiences that tech executives have blabbered on about forever. Videoconferencing, Web-enabled meetings, online collaboration tools—all are giving workers the ability to dart around the globe from their desk chairs.”

The article reminded me of driving from Jefferson City, MO, to Dubuque, IA (9 hours?) to call on a station manager who really didn’t want to see me. To get the appointment I said something like, “All I need is a minute of your time.”

When I walked into his office and started take a seat, he reminded me that I had said I only needed one minute and that’s all that I had. So I stood there with my little briefcase in hand and told him what our network could do for his station. (I didn’t sign him up) Today I might have just sent him a Quicktime file or made my “pitch” via iChat. No less effective and a lot less costly.

Videoconferencing and related technologies really only work when both parties want to hear what the other has to say. How many meetings take place because it was the only way the “prospect” could get the sales rep to leave her the fuck alone? (Wonder if there’s any data on that)

These days, most of the people I deal with in remote locations want to talk to me and I want to talk to them. And, increasingly, they have the tech skills to do a quick face-to-face.

And if I need to send them a url or an image or any other kind of file for that matter, it’s easy to do.

Old Schoolers will talk about body language and non-verbal communication and “pressing the flesh” and all the other arguments for being in the same room.

We’ll talk again when that airline ticket to the coast is $2,000.

How far would you drive to avoid flying?

This morning at 5:05, Seth Godin left his home outside of New York City. At 7:25 am, he was at the White House on Pennsylvania Avenue (for a meeting next door).

“No hassles, no affronts, no work stoppages, no FAA inspections, no surly overworked attendants, no lost items or near arrests or runway tie ups or traffic jams.”

I think he’s making a point about flying. I HATE everything about flying and will drive a long distance to avoid it. How far would you drive. I stuck a little poll thingy on the right side of the page.

Third-world Crime and Punishment

From the monthly newsletter written by my brother and his wife:

“During Medieval times when there was a theft in a village, the people set up a “Hue and Cry”.  This meant yelling, “Thief!” at the top of one’s lungs so that the other villagers would be alerted and the thief would be caught.  The system worked so well that often the hue and cry would be heard several miles away from the scene of the actual theft.

Here in Indonesia, a third-world country, there is also a system of “Hue and Cry”.  Only, the word thief is changed to the Indonesian word for thief, “Maling”.  As we and I sat down to lunch today, we heard the local “hue and cry” of “Maling!  Maling!” and we ran outside to see who the thief was.  He was a cowardly one; that was evident by the way he yanked the necklace off my next door neighbor’s neck and continued on his way ON HIS MOTORCYCLE!

This is a frequent occurrence in this country and if/when the thief is caught, he is usually beaten by the crowd while waiting for the police to show up.  He then may or may not receive a fair trial, depending on how much money the family can put up for his bail.”

If you’re going to San Francisco…

Flowers_hair…and I am. Leaving for MacWorld tomorrow. As a MacWorld virgin, I’ll be under the collective wings of George, Tom and Mark. Seasoned veterans all. If we were driving cross-country, this trip might make a decent road-trip movie. Middle-aged geeks search for meaning and happiness among 40,000 people talking to each other on their iPhones.

I’ll have the MacBook with me (I’m not sure you can get into SF without one for the next week) but blogging might be light. I really hope to soak up the experience and not worry too much about recording it. We’ll see.

ABC News forming one-man bureaus

“Taking the one-man band news crews a step further, ABC News President David Westin announced today that they will open seven new bureaus around the world with only one person per bureau. According to TVWeek, the reporters will write, shoot, edit and feed their material digitally from DV cameras and laptops wherever they are in the field. Assignments so far put people in South Korea; Jakarta, Indonesia; Rio de Janeiro, Brazil; Nairobi, Kenya; Mumbai, India; New Delhi, India; and Dubai, United Arab Emirates.” — Lost Remote

Sorry, I’m a radio reporter. I do interviews, cut up the sound, write the wrap and anchor a three minute newscast. You’re just gonna have to hire some more people do to that other stuff.

Big undersea quake hits Indonesia

Reuters: A powerful undersea earthquake has hit Indonesia’s West Java island. No tsunami warning (yet) and no immediate reports of damage or casualties. There has been some panic (no shit). The Indonesian quake watchers measured 7.0, while the U.S. geological survey said 7.4.

Indonesia

The quake struck 46 miles northwest of Indramayu and could be felt by residents in the capital Jakarta, as well as in the nearby city of Bandung (X marks the spot), which is where brother Blane & Family live. Still waiting to hear.

Update: Better map.

Update: 10:23 p.m. Just got email from Blane. "What earthquake?" That’s my baby brother.

Long Distance

Had a nice, leisurely chat with my brother tonight. We talked about 45 minutes. Regular readers know my brother lives on the island of Sumatra in Indonesia so we’ve always tried to keep our phone calls brief. Thanks to the miracle of Skype, we were able to really get caught up this evening (morning for him).

He recently got some kind of point-to-point, microwave Internet access. Not sure if it qualifies as “high speed,” but it’s a big improvement on the dial-up they’ve lived with since moving to Indonesia.

Skype_logo
Audio quality was pretty good. Waaay better than regular long distance connection. If he can boost his speed a little bit, we’re gonna try video. Stay tuned. And thank you, Skype.