Category Archives: Miscellany

Time travel companion wanted

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The following listing recently appeared on the Springfield, MO Craigslist:

“I have a functioning time machine (i know it sounds unbelievable, but I assure you it works) that I need a 2nd person to operate with me. I’m looking for someone who is adventurous and reliable. Preferable a male; or a female that can do heavy lifting. I am leaving on January 20, 2011 , in the morning and plan to return February 3,2011. I am going to June 1983 to handle some business.

If you are serious about time travel and are reliable, then please contact me. You do not have to pay anything, but you would have to provide someone to watch my cat for the time we are gone. The only qualifications needed are that you are reliable and that the circumference of your head is no more than 64cm.

We will be leaving from Springfield,Mo. Let me know if you want to go with me.”

My friend David Brazeal responded:

I stumbled upon your advertisement on Craigslist on the afternoon of January 20, 2011 — too late to join you on your excursion into the past.

Fortunately, having dabbled in time manipulation myself in the late 1830s, I was able to travel to January 17th, one day after you posted your listing, from which time I am responding.

I am both reliable and adventurous, and well-acquainted with 1983, having spent that summer as an intern in the State Department’s Office of Botswanan Affairs. In addition, I have an elderly aunt who loves cats.

Regarding your qualification that my head be less than 64cm in diameter, I assure you that, although my head is slightly too large for a standard time travel headpiece, I have crafted an adapter from a 1960s Oster beauty-salon hair dryer and the innards of a PlayStation 3 controller.

Please let me know as soon as possible whether you still require a companion for your trip. If you have filled the position, I need to return to January 20 to take some brownies out of the oven.

One more thing…

David is leaving our company (after 17 years) in a month or so, to strike out on his own (uh, should I rephrase that? Fuck it). The post above is just one more example of what I mean when I describe someone as “too funny for their job.”

DJ Steve

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It was almost 40 years ago I got my first taste of being “on the radio.” It as a very little pond but I was happy fish. It was easy to convince yourself a lot of people were listening to you. Very ego gratifying. I marvel at the freedom we had.

Somebody else said it better

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In a month this blog will be 9 years old. Should be very close to 5,000 posts by then. My friend George has been following along for the last several years and he says the blog has changed. He says I’m much more likely to post a line or two followed by a block quote from some other source. Or a video. Or a photo. George is of the opinion that I used to write longer, original pieces. I’m not sure he’s correct and it would just take some time to check but I’m willing to stipulate that he is right. So, why the change?

  • I’m less sure of my opinions. And, more importantly, feel less need to share them or -thank god- be “right.” I’m pretty sure I would be unable to pass Scott Adams’ “Ignorance Test” on a lot of subjects I’ve expressed opinions on. Oh, and it has finally sunk in that almost nobody really cares what somebody else thinks.
  • More (better?) places to share thoughts/links. When I started this blog in February of 2002, there was no Twitter, YouTube, Flickr, Facebook, Posterous, etc. A lot of the links and block quotes that used to land here, are shared somewhere else.
  • Somebody else said it better. I think this is the Big One. I read more (and more varied) stuff now than at any other time in my life. The web has exposed me to an almost infinite variety of ideas and perspectives. From people who CAN pass the Ignorance Test. Who DO know what they’re talking about. And who express themselves clearly and powerfully. So, if there’s an idea that I think is worth sharing, I link to them with an excerpt to pique your interest.

George is right. smays.com has become more about aggregation and curation. Maybe a little like my personal card catalogue. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve come back here to find a quote or a video or reference that would otherwise be lost (to me) forever.

Mobile, indestructible dwelling with armoured shell

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“Huge change is no longer in the past or future but in the present. Our society as we know it and have known to be safe is fast-changing. Value systems of yesterday are no longer relevant. A new civilization is ahead of us. This ideological society offers choice; are we able to find alternate ways of living, another model or are our days counted? The changing climate, growing poverty, wars and more are only expanding. This movable nomadic dwelling unit provides shelter from this disconcerting situation.”

More photos

Where is Your Mind Right Now?

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This kind of moment has been happening more and more often. The most encouraging part of it is that it doesn’t seem to matter what the content of the scene is, only whether I’m aware enough to absorb it without assessing its implications to my personal interests. When my interests and preferences aren’t informing the picture — when I am not looking at it in terms of what it’s adding or taking away from me — it’s like I can watch it without being there. I am alive and aware without the normal heaviness of being a needy, self-obsessed human being. And that is where beauty is found. — (raptitude.com

This reminds me of the massive amount of data that floods into our brains every second. Every sense is pumping information that gets translated by the mind.

I have this fantasy of waking from a coma with no memory and being bombarded by this… tsunami? … of data. The light, sounds smells hitting my consciousness as if for the first time. What would that be like? Could we survive it?

Our minds (brain?) would throttle it back to something that would not make our heads explode. But what if we want to go the other way? Take the throttle off. Let the data come streaming in. But that’s not right. The data IS streaming in. We’re just not really experiencing it. What if I want ever photon? Every 1 and 0?

It seems logical that we have that capability. The hardware is the same. It must be the software that has robbed us of seeing all the world has to offer.

Perhaps if we reformat and reinstall?

Palace Theater goes dark

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The Palace Theater will close its doors this Sunday. It has been Kennett’s only theater for a long time. Growing up in the 50’s, we had a second theater for a while, until the Ritz burned (can’t recall the year). During the early 50’s, The Palace was “segregated” with people of color sitting in the balcony and colorless people below. I’m not sure if this was by choice or enforced. (Just the sort of question a white kid would ask, no?)

In front of the Palace Theater in Kennett, MO

In front of the Palace Theater in Kennett, MO

Based on the movies on the marquee, I believe this photo was taken in 1954. My father is the one riding in the wheelbarrow. Jimmy Haggett is pushing him (in the annual Fall Festival Parade, I believe) because pop won a popularity contest pitting “pop” music against country.

In its day, The Palace was a fine old theater. We were lucky to have it.